Another $%^#$ Reunion Email

So, the reunion is coming up, and ticket sales are low. I mentioned the other day that I was considering sending an email to some of the kids in my class who hadn't purchased tickets and who I thought would appreciate the humor of the situation.

In deference to my publicist's advice, I didn't use the subject line I wanted to. Instead, I used "Cox High '96 Reunion: All of the Fun, None of the Botox." Probably for the best, Christy would have had a heart-attack if she caught wind of the other one...

And the letter was significantly more tame than the options I threw out earlier. See what I mean?

Hey, [Random Classmate]!

I know you’ve probably gotten about 10,000 calls/emails/texts/IMs/people jumping up at you from behind the bushes (sorry, that was my crazy ex – totally not related to this) about this already, but trust me, there’s a reason. The Class of ’96 Ten-Year Reunion is coming up fast, and it won’t be the same without you there!!

Whether you’ve spent the last ten years raising hell or raising babies; serving your community or 5 to 10 in the pen; happily married or giving those girls from Sex and the City a run for their money, I know you’ve got some great stories to tell. Why not share them in Virginia Beach this Labor Day Weekend?

There are a lot of things I could say to encourage you to attend our class reunion, but frankly, they all invoke images of Grosse Point Blank and Romy and Michelle’s High School Reunion, and we all know how those movies turned out (everyone put big smiles on their faces, showed up looking fantastic, and there was relatively little bloodshed). Sadly, we don’t live in the movies; you probably need a few “real-people” reasons to book it to the beach for a long weekend:

• Spend quality time with the folks in September, and you’re free to head to Vegas this Christmas.
• Admit it…you really want to see how your prom date turned out.
• Pimp your blog, latest novel, or soon-to-be-released independent album or film.
• Spiked punch? Forget it, we’ve got a bar!
• Put those crazy hit-man rumors to rest once and for all. :)

If, despite all this, the thought of purchasing a ticket to our Ten-Year Reunion STILL makes you want to drink, check out this exciting offer from Bombay Sapphire, courtesy of their beautiful and fabulous (totally objective opinion, the fact that she’s my twin sister is completely beside the point) publicist:
If you purchase a ticket to the class reunion by July 31, you will be entered into a drawing for a bottle of Bombay Sapphire Premium Gin, a cocktail recipe book, and two martini glasses courtesy of Bombay Sapphire.

So now you’re probably thinking, “Quit rambling, girl, just give me the details.” Here they are…

• Date: Saturday, September 2, 2006
• Location: The Lesner Inn - 3319 Shore Drive, Virginia Beach, VA 23451 (http://www.lesnerinn.com/)
• Price: $60 per ticket (plus a $3 “PayPal Charge” if you purchase online)
• Ticket Sales: Make checks payable to: Cox Class of 1996. Mail to: SCHOOL ADDRESS DELETED
• All the rest: http://www.cox96alumni.org/

I know that in the movies, most of these notes sign off with something like, “Get on down to the old homestead and see how the cows are doing.” Again: Grosse Point Blank + Romy and Michelle + usually doesn’t make a whole lot of sense = not happening. Therefore, I hope the last 10 have been all you’ve ever wanted them to be, I’d love to hear an update, and, if your parole officer clears it, I’ll see you in VA Beach this Labor Day Weekend! Don’t forget, purchase your tickets by July 31, and you’re eligible for the gin drawing!

Cheers!

~Linds