I have heard...

Two different versions of the same song within the same half hour this
morning. And it's not a new song at all, it's freaking "Always on My
Mind"!

Of the two, I think I prefer Willie Nelson's original recipe over the
Pet Shop Boys' "SVU edition."

Somehow, however, I think this must mean something. Trust me, I'm
looking into it....

He's back...

Ok, seriously, I want to know who gave my blog address to Potter. Oh, since I tend to use aliases, your hint (at least for the Baltimore folks) is -- same first name, same last initial.

Know who it is? Ok, then who's been spilling?

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Someone must have because whenever I seem to be going through some inner turmoil about my dating situation, this guy shows up. He's dormant for months waiting, it seems, for me to start doubting the man of the moment. As soon as I do, I get an email from him.

"Just checking in," it says. "How are you doing?"

Usually that's it. And I start to think, how AM I doing? Professionally, I'm doing supremely well. Well enough, in fact, that if I focused on that, I think I could actually talk to Potter. But it's the dating side of it that I don't want to get into. I don't want to let in (even through email), that all is not well in the world of men. Because as much as I don't want to date him, any inkling that he may receive of that would mean a constant onslaught of emails and embarrassing stories where he takes a joke out of context and attempts to "flirt" with me by repeating this out of context joke over and over in situations where I'm trying to maintain a modicum of dignity.

Anyway, he's back. Lucky me. Seriously, if it was you who dished the addy, please prepare for the consequences. Thanks.

Do you ever wonder

If sometimes you're the only one who remembers a joke? Then, you find out that you weren't.

Case in point, a couple of years ago, my friend Erica and I were driving with another friend who kept cranking the radio every time Outkast's "Miss Jackson" (you know the one, Outkast apologizes for knocking the daughter up) came on. He was singing along with it and substituting Erica's last name at the time for "Jackson." It was a freaking riot at the time, and even now, when I hear that song (not as often as I'd like), I can't help singing along with Ryan's "edits." Just one of the reasons I don't do that song at Karaoke.

So, I thought I was the only one who remembered that until this morning, when I checked the now-married and pregnant (but not to Ryan! Funny, but NO) Erica's Myspace page. There it was, blaring out....

I'm sorry Miss Jackson, I am for REAL.
Never meant to make your daughter cry
I apologize a trillion times

This is why I love CNN.com

From the article about the search in NYC for guy who mugged the 101 Year
Old woman...

Meanwhile, New Yorkers struggled for the right words to describe the
attacker because expletives just don't seem adequate.

It's a Small World, After All

I took French. I understand it (if you speak slowly enough), I read it, and I speak enough of it to not make a total ass of myself anywhere outside of Paris.

I can master one, and only one, complete sentence in Spanish. Thank you, Jack Wagner, for that.

Apparently, I'm not the only one....

I randomly came across the Number1HappyStreet blog this afternoon. He just got back from Disney World and had this to say....

I have never taken any Spanish, but after a week of riding the Monorail, I can now alert Hispanics to stand clear of moving doors if ever the need arises.

Bring out the dancing dolls, it's a Small World after all.

By the by, this absolutely gorgeous monorail photo was taken by Flickr user StartedByAMouse.

It's not too late

To make plans to check out my friend's show at the Hamilton Art's Collective tomorrow night in Baltimore!

Seriously, if I can muster up an email to some guy I haven't seen in like a dozen years, you can muster the energy to come on out and laugh your ass off.

It's a fair trade.

8:00 tomorrow. $10 at the door. Free cider until it runs out and then it's BYOB.

Books O Rama

What do the books I've read say about me? What would your list look like?

I borrowed this from someone in the blog-o-sphere since it reminded me of books I want to add to my reading list. Look at the list of books below.

• Bold the ones you've read
• Italicize the ones you want to read
• Leave blank the ones that you aren't interested in.

Do with this information what you will. I don't tag people, but feel free to play along. I guess I'm cheating a little, but I'm also counting books on tape. I figure it's still "reading" if you're stuck in traffic enjoying a book. Plus, it's really the only way that I gotthrough the LOTR trilogy. Those are starred and bolded...

1. The Da Vinci Code (Dan Brown)
2. Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austen) -- mmmmmm....Darcy....
3. To Kill A Mockingbird (Harper Lee)
4. Gone With The Wind (Margaret Mitchell)
5. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King (Tolkien)*
6. The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring (Tolkien)*
7. The Lord of the Rings: Two Towers (Tolkien)*
8. Anne of Green Gables (L.M. Montgomery) -- read the wholeseries too...my favorite chapter is the last one of the last book.
9. Outlander (Diana Gabaldon)
10. A Fine Balance (Rohinton Mistry)
11. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (Rowling)
12. Angels and Demons (Dan Brown)
13. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (Rowling)
14. A Prayer for Owen Meany (John Irving)
15. Memoirs of a Geisha (Arthur Golden)*
16. Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone (Rowling)
17. Fall on Your Knees(Ann-Marie MacDonald)
18. The Stand (Stephen King)
19. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (Rowling)
20. Jane Eyre (Charlotte Bronte)
21. The Hobbit (Tolkien)*
22. The Catcher in the Rye (J.D. Salinger) -- SHOCKING, I know!
23. Little Women (Louisa May Alcott)
24. The Lovely Bones (Alice Sebold)
25. Life of Pi (Yann Martel)
26. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (Douglas Adams)
27. Wuthering Heights (Emily Bronte)
28. The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe (C. S. Lewis)
29. East of Eden (John Steinbeck) *
30. Tuesdays with Morrie (Mitch Albom)*
31. Dune (Frank Herbert)
32. The Notebook (Nicholas Sparks)* -- word to the wise, don't listen to this in the car. I almost got into an accident in South Carolina because I was crying so hard.
33. Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand)
34. 1984 (Orwell)
35. The Mists of Avalon (Marion Zimmer Bradley)
36. The Pillars of the Earth (Ken Follett)
37. The Power of One (Bryce Courtenay)
38. I Know This Much is True (Wally Lamb)
39. The Red Tent (Anita Diamant)
40. The Alchemist (Paulo Coelho)
41. The Clan of the Cave Bear (Jean M. Auel)
42. The Kite Runner (Khaled Hosseini)
43. Confessions of a Shopaholic (Sophie Kinsella)
44. The Five People You Meet In Heaven (Mitch Albom) -- LOVEIT!!
45. Bible -- Most of it.
46. Anna Karenina (Tolstoy)
47. The Count of Monte Cristo (Alexandre Dumas)
48. Angela's Ashes (Frank McCourt)
49. The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck)
50. She's Come Undone (Wally Lamb) but I don't remember anything aboutit.
51. The Poisonwood Bible (Barbara Kingsolver)
52. A Tale of Two Cities (Dickens) -- It was the best of books, it was the worst of books....
53. Ender's Game (Orson Scott Card)
54. Great Expectations (Dickens)
55. The Great Gatsby (Fitzgerald)
56. The Stone Angel (Margaret Laurence)
57. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (Rowling)
58. The Thorn Birds (Colleen McCullough)
59. The Handmaid's Tale (Margaret Atwood)
60. The Time Traveller's Wife (Audrew Niffenegger) -- it's up next
61. Crime and Punishment (Fyodor Dostoyevsky)
62. The Fountainhead (Ayn Rand)
63. War and Peace (Tolstoy)
64. Interview With The Vampire (Anne Rice)
65. Fifth Business (Robertson Davis)
66. One Hundred Years Of Solitude (Gabriel Garcia Marquez)
67. The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants (Ann Brashares)
68. Catch-22 (Joseph Heller)
69. Les Miserables (Hugo)
70. The Little Prince (Antoine de Saint-Exupery)
71. Bridget Jones' Diary (Fielding)
72. Love in the Time of Cholera (Marquez) -- I just found out this was a real book.
73. Shogun (James Clavell)
74. The English Patient (Michael Ondaatje)
75. The Secret Garden (Frances Hodgson Burnett)
76. The Summer Tree (Guy Gavriel Kay)
77. A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Betty Smith)
78. The World According To Garp (John Irving)
79. The Diviners (Margaret Laurence)
80. Charlotte's Web (E.B. White)
81. Not Wanted On The Voyage (Timothy Findley)
82. Of Mice And Men (Steinbeck)
83. Rebecca (Daphne DuMaurier)
84. Wizard's First Rule (Terry Goodkind)
85. Emma (Jane Austen)
86. Watership Down(Richard Adams)
87. Brave New World (Aldous Huxley)
88. The Stone Diaries (Carol Shields)
89. Blindness (Jose Saramago)
90. Kane and Abel (Jeffrey Archer)
91. In The Skin Of A Lion (Ondaatje)
92. Lord of the Flies (Golding)
93. The Good Earth(Pearl S. Buck)
94. The Secret Life of Bees (Sue Monk Kidd)
95. The Bourne Identity (Robert Ludlum)
96. The Outsiders (S.E. Hinton)
97. White Oleander (Janet Fitch)
98. A Woman of Substance (Barbara Taylor Bradford) -- Another great series that I need to read the rest of....
99. The Celestine Prophecy (James Redfield)
100. Ulysses (James Joyce) -- I tried once and got over it.