It's been a while

3.5 years to be exact.

What can I say, I've been busy.  I've:

• Gained and lost a roomate
• Lost and gained 20 lbs (twice)
• Run 2 marathons (and am training for a third)
• Run 7 or 8 half marathons (they're all starting to run together...pun intended)
• Written two novels (neither of them published...yet)
• Fallen in love twice
• Had my heart smashed twice
• Watched friends marry and divorce
• Met three of my favorite authors
• Watched a friend gain and lose a television show (but he's back on TV now...)
• Lost dear friends to cancer (LET'S FIND A CURE!)
• Joined the Bone Marrow Registry
• Joined the RWA
• Watched my sister meet the man she'll soon marry
• Survived a hurricane and an earthquake in the same week
• Camped in the woods (never again)
• Camped on the beach (again again!)
• Witnessed a full body apparition
• Went to Texas looking to meet a cowboy (and met a biker instead...NOT the same thing)

Interesting stories, all.  One day I might just tell them.  In the meantime, I'm excited to be back, sharing these little snippits of my life...or something resembling reality.

Smalltimore

I haven't done a thing of substance today. All right, a thing of substance that has required me to get dressed. I wrote over 1,000 words for my Nano novel, and got a little bit of "real work" done, but I'm kind of digging the idea of spending my Sunday in my pj's belting songs from my Natalie Cole CD.

Thanks to Charissa and Danielle for organizing the Blogger HH on Friday. I really enjoyed meeting everyone!! I promised I'd look into organizing January. Hope people like karaoke.... ;)

I also figured out just how small this town really is this weekend. Friday night, it turned out that Summer and hubby (Matt) were neighbors of my friend Kristen. That was random enough, but after what happened Saturday, I'm more convinced than ever that this really is the "Biggest Small Town in America" (a much better slogan IMO than "Get In On It"):
When I'm nervous about a big decision, and after I get opinions from my friends (who are the most wonderful people in the world and who would totally have my back in any bar fight I may happen to find myself in), but I still don't know what I'm going to do, I employ the tried-and-true "man on the street opinion." Of course, in this case, it's the "Random Chick in the Bathroom" approach.

Yesterday, I asked the opinion of this girl in the bathroom, and we started talking (boys, this is normal female behavior, I assure you), and then we walked out. Never exchanged names, because that kills the "random chick" part of the whole thing. Plus, you'll never "see this girl again." To exchange names is kind of against the "random chick in bathroom" advice column code. I headed out the door to meet my friends again, and I was halfway up the street when this guy came rushing out of the bar yelling, "Hey Stranger!!!"

Turns out, "Random Chick" wasn't as random as I thought. I worked with her husband at T. Rowe for four years!!! He met her after I left, and married her about a year ago. Considering I had never been in that bar before IN.MY.LIFE. it wasn't supposed to happen. Yet it did.

One thing: I was named MVP of my football game yesterday. I actually made four catches and then, apparently, posed with the ball like I was dancing. Not sure what happened there, but I made four catches!! ;)

AND NAVY WON!!

Good weekend all around.

Blasts from the past

When most people take a look at their college graduation photos, it's with a wistful eye and a longing for a fleeting youth.

I, on the other hand, wonder where the hell the baby I was so-obviously carrying in those photos is.

My friends look freaking awesome and still do. I'm glad I finally discovered the gym.

I recently found (re-found, actually) , some rolls of film that I hadn't had developed since I moved to Baltimore. On a whim, and because I was bound and determined to do it before the photos were completely lost, I developed three of them. Oddly enough, I learned that unlike most women who find themselves pushing thirty wishing for the "killer bod" they had in high school and college, I wouldn't trade the body I have now for anything. All right, I may give up something (leg, ear, probably-not-arm, etc.) for George Clooney's body, but that's a totally other thing. :)

I may decide to share them with the masses, but not yet. I'm still pretty embarrassed. For right now, they're just a reminder of good times, fleeting youth, and the fact that I'm healthier at 29 than I ever was in college.

It's back!!

Between VT/ECU and JMU/UNC-Chapel Hill, I am happier than a kitten in a milk jug. Seriously, not much is better than college football season, when entire communities come together for sunny Saturday afternoons, ESPN coverage, and of course, stupid pranks being played on each other.

The VT game is in the 4th, and JMU doesn't get started until 6, but I can already sense it's going to be an amazing season for both of my favorite teams. Tech, frankly, needs this. They had a nice ceremony this morning commemorating the 4/16 tragedy and the victims, and then they went straight to business. Though ECU hasn't rolled over and invited them to take the game as well as its money (a $100,000 donation from ECU to Hokie Spirit resulted in both teams entering Lane at the same time to discourage booing), they've given me a great game to watch while I've been working my ass off. It was clear that the emotions were with the guys during the first half, but things have improved considerably. If Tech can hold it together for the next 9 minutes, Lane Stadium is going to be shaking to its foundation.

I'm not sensing great things out of Chapel Hill tonight. I love my Dukes, but the UNC program is solid, strong, and playing at home. Not too promising, but I hope I'm wrong!!

Only one more week until the VT-LSU game, and three weeks until I'm at Lane Stadium to scream 81 North/64 EAST!!!!


BTW, is anyone else laughing their heads off about the Michigan/App State game? Michigan has no idea what they're looking at!

Weekend Update

I went camping this weekend.

Now, I know what most of you are probably thinking...Lindsay out in the woods? Ok, what terrorist organization kidnapped her and took her out into a world where there was no running water, no makeup (thanks Mike Z.), and no comfortable beds?

If you must know, it was the Boy Scouts. Then again, it wasn't out in the woods. We were on Assateague Island, and it was incredibly gorgeous.

I had a freaking awesome time. I always have a good time when I'm with my absolute favorite boy in the entire world (he knows who he is) and his friends. What can I say, these are some hot people, and they put up with my girlyness.

More updates later (like the real story on how I lost half my suit), but first a photo:

Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow....

Hi New People

I promise, the update from this weekend's camping trip (including being felt up by a Sand Crab and losing part of my bathing suit in the ocean) is coming, but first I have to address a quick little concern. Since, you know, I'd like to stay in my parents' will (and good graces).

If you've found me through my brand-new Facebook profile, like what I have to say and have any sort of relationship to someone who knows my parents (basically, if it would be more awkward than a nun in a whorehouse if we started dating), THIS IS NOT THE SITE THAT YOU WANT TO SHARE WITH THOSE PEOPLE!!

This is the site you want to share with those parental types:

http://the-f-files.blogspot.com

Same stuff, except it's a PG-rated version.

It sometimes happens that a woman is handsomer at twenty-nine than she was ten years before. If there has neither been ill-health nor anxiety, it is a time of life at which scarcely any charm is lost. ~ Jane Austen

Happy Birthday to my little sister!!

Check it out

My friend Matt's in this commercial. He's the cowboy who gets bowled over by the folks coming through the door as well as the cowboy in the middle when the group jumps over the chair and starts typing.



Matt, I'm totally digging the 'stache, bud!

Independence Day

It's that time of year again....


Time for the country to take a breather, a time out, and celebrate a major accomplishment by blowing each other up with the pyrotechnic amateur hour.


Call it: Thanksgiving for the dangerous, if you will.


This year, we have much to celebrate in the world of independence. Scooter Libby is one step away from a presidential pardon. Paris Hilton is finally out of jail. Nicole Ritchie is finally going to eat again (we hope!!).


But I know that the real reason that we're all celebrating this year is because of the six little words my boss said to me yesterday:

Everything looks good; let's open the system.

For those of you not in IT, that means: The project from hell is officially done!!!

Photo by Flickr User: Kyle Walton

Yes, kids, my life can finally get back to normal. I can go out on a weeknight. I can resume my half-marathon training with gusto. I can make it back to the gym. I can go to bed not having worked a 14 hour day (like last week when I worked 50 hours of overtime). I can wake up at a normal time. I can eat real food again (again, last week: the pizza guy and I were on first-names and I gained 5 pounds). I can breathe. I can sing (karaoke!). I can take people up on their social invitations.

I can go on vacation.

I've even written a short play about it (ok, really, it wasn't me, but if you want to have a role, you'll say it was me).

Supportive Friend: Linds, that's awesome that your project is done. What are you going to do next?

Me: I'M GOING TO DISNEY WORLD!!!!

Photo by Flickr User: JiminDestin

See, how hard was that?

I do want to sincerely thank each and every one of you for all your support over the last month and a half. For putting up with my spaciness, last-minute plan cancelling, late night emails, early departures, and (most of all) total lack of posting.

Updates are coming. Now that I have my life back, I'll have some fun and interesting things to say, I'm sure.

Laura and Brad's Wedding (6/8 - yes, I know that the update is late!)

I just realized that I never put this up. What can I say? It's JUNE!

Anyway, I had a fantastic time at my friends' wedding on the 8th. Brad is a very lucky guy, and Laura, being one of the kindest people I've ever known, is a perfect match for him (not to mention a gorgeous bride!). These are my buds from my college major, the people who kept my marks high thanks to monster late night studying sessions and the ISAT curve!!!



PS: Yes, they're twins. Actually, it turns out multiples travel in packs...one of the guests (who isn't pictured because I met her at the shower instead of the wedding) is an identical triplet!!

Quote of the day

I ♥ this quote, and considering that I'm quite gorgeous, if I do say so myself, I have to agree with it. :)

Miss Piggy

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye."

Just another Friday night in Baltimore

It is a truth universally certain that when you have reached your fourth decade, the last place that you should be found on a Friday night is a bathroom stall in a Baltimore bar with your panties in the trash and your shorts in one of the sinks.

Completely. Passed. Out.

The problem of course, is that is exactly where we found the woman at Tysons Pub on Friday night. This, you may remember, is the place that my friend's boyfriend (ok, my friend too) was looking to buy. As they were coming down to meet us, they happened to notice that it was open, so we thought we'd check it out for a drink and possibly get the information that Aaron had been looking for.

Oh, it was open, all right. Turns out that the new owners were celebrating their opening night with a bit of a bang. Not in the good way, of course, the place was pretty dead. Just like we initially suspected the girl in the bathroom to be.

Becca went in first. She noticed the girl and her two drunk friends. She alerted the owners. They told her that they already knew. Nice. Then, I went in, determined that 911 needed to be called, actually called 911, played 20 questions (Heart conditions? Nope. Diabetes? Nope - though I suspected Type 2. Age? I was about to say 21 when her friend goes, "42" -- WTF! Oh, and she had three kids), and advised the women that their friend probably should have her pants on when the cops arrive so that she could avoid an indecency charge. I'm telling you, those wild days at Bar Baltimore trained me well.

All the while, the owner is trying to convince me that it's not a good idea to actually call 911. He can take her to his house. Yeah, that's a good idea. So now, instead of her passing out and dying in the bar, she can pass out and die at the home of someone who will undoubtedly return to the bar upon depositing her on the couch, bed or floor. Considering that she had soiled herself (seriously, can it GET any worse?), my guess was leaning towards the floor.

So, then the firefighters show up and, shortly thereafter, the rescue squad. They agree with my assessment that Patty needs to go to hospital. Not to jail; not to the house. Hospital. They load her up on the stretcher and attempt to wheel her out the front door. But no, the owner still doesn't think it's good for business that this completely irresponsible person is wheeled out the front door. He tries to get them to go through the back -- limited alley access, I believe. Ok, how about a side-door? Still not happening...the stretcher can't make the turn.

So out the front she goes. And her friends STICK AROUND THE BAR. No one's going with her to answer the questions, hold her hand, or protect her from the embarrassment that's sure to come when the doctors figured out that not only was she not wearing clean underwear (mama always said*), she wasn't wearing anything at all. Nope, they've bellied up and ordered another. Oh, and started complaining that it was a waste of the taxpayers money for both the fire department and the ambulance to show up. Definitely weird, but then we get those two final details:

1) she was an employee
2) they had a provisional liquor license. If the cops had figured out that the staff was getting snockered on the first night, they would have been reduced to serving O'Doules and Diet Sodas.

With friends like these....

Can I just say right here and now that I'm grateful for the friends I have? Some of whom also left me on Friday night. However, it was much later and in the company of a perfect gentleman. Who, because it's one of the perils of giving away your blog address too soon, is asking for his very own alias. Problem being that the one he suggested ("Mike") won't really work for various and sundry reasons. So, Shakespeare -- possibly -- Berger -- though, frankly, I'm not sure I can support using the name of a man who breaks up with a girl on a post-it -- is going to be surprised by whatever I finally come up with.

Anyway, as I said, nice guy who claimed to have been intimidated by Cassie. He needn't be, she's very nice and confidential to Christopher Marlowe, SHE WAS JOKING!!! Though, I'm pretty sure you'll never forget her name again.

I have noticed a bit of a disturbing trend already. Both times I've seen him (at Max's and then on Friday), he'll walk away for a moment (drink, lav, back to friends...) which seems to invite a new "friend" to appear at my side and not leave me alone to the point that I'm actually uncomfortable. The first time, it was a Baltimore City police officer who, despite the fact that he kept complimenting me on the fact that he was pleasantly surprised I could write in a bar, wouldn't actually let me do it. Friday, it was this guy who felt the need to share that the reason he was out drinking in a bar is because his wife slapped him. He (bitch-slap) then brought over his friends and they just took over the table like they belonged there. By the time He-Who-Has-Yet-To-Be-Named returned, there were like five rednecks and a Gretchen Wilson wannabe hanging over the table. They provided quite a bit of amusement, and conversation fodder. Not that we needed it. Now, I'm not saying this is a problem that I can't handle, but if it happens again, I may have no choice but to assume that he's actually sending these weirdos over in an attempt to make himself look even better. If he is, I do have to commend him on an interesting tactic. I'll keep you guys posted. ;)

* About the underwear thing. Not that this matters, but there's this guy I went to HS with who is actually a doctor at Hopkins' ER. Really, I'm thinking that the last person who needs to see me in laundry-panties is Dr. McBeachy; after all, he'll talk to Dr. McDoggie (he's a vet from our class) who'll talk to his mom, who'll talk to my mom (they're librarians together) who will talk to me about the sage advice of always having clean undies in case you have to go to hospital and the fact that I didn't follow it on the day that I happened to have been doing laundry and falling down the stairs in my home. Then, I'll be all upset because while the undies will most definitely have been clean, they wouldn't have been cute and my drug-addled brain (assuming painkillers here) won't have any clue where in the telephone-chain screwed up the order and that's not really something you can call up anyone and go "Did you say I wasn't wearing clean undies when McBeachy saved my life? Because I totally was." So yeah, I'm just saying that if I'm ever in a situation where one of you is having to take charge of me after an accident at home, could you make sure that I'm wearing cute undies before the ambulance comes to take me to the ER? It sounds weird, I know, but it would really help my recovery. Thanks.

Where can you see Lions?

Only in Kenya!!

That kind of explains why my sister, who went to South Africa and Namibia, didn't get any photos of them. However, she got a bunch of other great photos from her humanitarian mission with the UNA and a corporate sponsor. Since she's a little zonked from her trip, I put some of these together for her.





Confidential to Jules: Clearly we're even for Wake Forest.... ;p

A Word from the Hokie Nation

Virginia Tech family members across the country have united to declare this Friday, April 20th, an "Orange and Maroon Effect" day to honor those killed in the tragic events on campus Monday, and to show support for Virginia Tech students, faculty, administrators, staff, alumni, and friends. "Orange and Maroon Effect" was born several years ago as an invitation to Tech fans to wear orange and maroon to Virginia Tech athletic events. We invite everyone from all over the country to be a part of the Virginia Tech family this Friday, to wear orange and maroon to support the families of those who were lost, and to support the school and community we all love so much.

Also, many young Engineering Professionals around the country are taking their Professional Certification exam this Friday. Many are young VT Graduates who have lost professors and friends in these awful events. As Certified Engineers will tell you, studying for this exam has consumed their lives for the last several months. To have this happen in the home stretch is simply not what they need. If you could please take some time on Friday to send some warm thoughts and good luck their way, I'm sure it will help and be appreciated.

The Dawg Pound ♥'s Hokie Nation!

Do you ever wonder

If sometimes you're the only one who remembers a joke? Then, you find out that you weren't.

Case in point, a couple of years ago, my friend Erica and I were driving with another friend who kept cranking the radio every time Outkast's "Miss Jackson" (you know the one, Outkast apologizes for knocking the daughter up) came on. He was singing along with it and substituting Erica's last name at the time for "Jackson." It was a freaking riot at the time, and even now, when I hear that song (not as often as I'd like), I can't help singing along with Ryan's "edits." Just one of the reasons I don't do that song at Karaoke.

So, I thought I was the only one who remembered that until this morning, when I checked the now-married and pregnant (but not to Ryan! Funny, but NO) Erica's Myspace page. There it was, blaring out....

I'm sorry Miss Jackson, I am for REAL.
Never meant to make your daughter cry
I apologize a trillion times

It's not too late

To make plans to check out my friend's show at the Hamilton Art's Collective tomorrow night in Baltimore!

Seriously, if I can muster up an email to some guy I haven't seen in like a dozen years, you can muster the energy to come on out and laugh your ass off.

It's a fair trade.

8:00 tomorrow. $10 at the door. Free cider until it runs out and then it's BYOB.

Beep Beep!

We've all done it. We may not admit to doing it, but somewhere in our past history, we've all done it.

No, not that. Seriously, get your head out of the gutter!! I'm talking about throwing someone "under the bus" to save ourselves.

Anyone who's read my friend Bea's blog in the last week knows what I'm referring to, but since I've promised her no direct links, let me catch the rest of you up:

Last November, Bea and I went to a party at our friend Ginger's house. Great time. Lots of people. Lots of distractions, if you know what I mean. I hooked up with a friend from the past, Bea made a new friend.

Now, being that I was "otherwise engaged," I can honestly tell you that aside from Ginger's boyfriend, Elle's boyfriend, and my friend from the past, I couldn't pick the guys at that party out of a lineup. Seriously, all hell could have broken loose that night, and I would have been blissfully unaware of my surroundings.

Yes, the party was that good.

So fast forward to Tuesday night. I'm at a meeting and so are Bea and Ginger. Ginger's brought a friend who looks slightly familiar, but I think that it's because he bears a strong resemblance to David Sutcliffe from Gilmore Girls. I introduce myself, and NotChristopher says, "We've met."

Ginger then jumps in with, "Yep, he was at my party in November."

Being slightly embarrassed (I'm great with faces, terrible with names), I'm laughing as I grab Bea and go, "Oh so you must remember Bea too. Bea, this is NotChristopher."

Sure, I guess you could say that I threw her under the bus at that point (I didn't recognize him, maybe she wouldn't either. We'd all have a good laugh and move on). But it wasn't that simple. See, I was thinking it was like a bicycle. Bea, however, saw it more like a mack truck.

Reading her blog on Wednesday, I got the full story. To paraphrase (again, not linking because I promised not to, but I did tell her I was telling this story here, so I'm not tossing her under again if that's what you're thinking):

Last night, ran into a boy I made out with months ago. Linds laughed was laughing as she reintroduced us. That was a nice touch.

Photo by Flickr user Freja McQueen

Seriously. No. Clue. Whatsoever.

I immediately started explaining the laughter to her, and we've gotten some of our own shared-meaning laughter out of the whole situation. I'm just worried about what poor NotChristopher thinks!!!

Quiz Time

I found this quiz on my friend's blog, and I just had to take it....

The Priss Deliberate Brutal Love Dreamer (DBLDf) Mature. Responsible. Aristocratic. Excuse me. The Priss. Prisses are the smartest of all female types. You're highly perceptive, and confident in your judgements. You'd take brutal honesty over superficiality any time--your friends always know where they stand with you. You're completely unfake. Don't tell me that's not a word. You're also excellent at redirecting internal negative energy. These facts indicate people are often intimidated by you. They also fall for you, hard. You have a distant, composed allure that many find irresistible. If only more of them lived up to your standards. Your exact opposite: The Playstation Random Gentle Sex Master You were probably the last among your friends to have sex. And the first to pretend that you're pregnant. LOL. Though you're inclined to use sex as weapon, at least it's not as one of mass destruction. You're choosier than most about your partners. A supportive relationship is what you're really after. Whether you know it or not, you need something steady & long-term. And soothing. ALWAYS AVOID: The Playboy, The Loverboy CONSIDER: The Manchild Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.

So, did you have a crush on me too?

The request that I posted on MySpace earlier today was simple enough...

The year is coming to an end...so as a COMMENT on my page, leave one memory that u and I had together. It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember! DON'T SEND A MESSAGE, LEAVE A COMMENT. Next re-post this bulletin and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty cool (and fun) to see the responses. Re-post as "memories of us".

The funny thing is that apparently today is, "Let Lindsay know about your long-lost crush from fifteen years ago" day 2006. I know, I should be totally flattered, and frankly I am, but I think it's funny that the first two people to respond to my request for 2006 memories decided to use their few lines to tell me all about these crushes that they had on me when we were kids.

In response to them I say:

E - I knew. It wasn't a secret crush because a) even Aaron knew and he wasn't that bright and b) you were pretty damn obvious about the whole thing. I'm stoked that you're finally admitting now, I only wish you had done it about six or seven years ago. :( Then again, we weren't talking six or seven years ago so I probably wouldn't have gotten the message.

N - Um, who are you exactly? Best I can tell, you were a freshman when I was a senior, but if that was the case, then you're not who I thought you were (which is a tad disappointing because I thought that guy hated my guts and it would be wonderful to find out that he was actually doing the whole "hating because I care" thing after all this time). Anyway, wanna give me a hint here? Thanks!

Since the ego needs a little stroking (interesting weekend), if YOU had/have a crush on me that you'd like to share, feel free. If you're somewhat local, who knows where it'll get you. ;p

Happy Holidays

I promise, the long year-end letter is coming soon, but I left my drafts at the office and I'm so not going back there until New Years. In the meantime, I just wanted to wish everyone Happy Holidays and a fabulous New Years!!

~ Linds